Your Worth isn’t even on the Table

Your Worth isn’t even on the Table

Try this on for size. Your WORTH isn’t up for questioning. Your WORTH isn’t even on the table. It’s non negotiable. It’s not even a THING! The last month or so I’ve personally been grappling with this nasty energy of unworthiness, self doubt, and not enoughness. It’s been more present than usual, more up in the air and showing up in all of my client conversations. In fact part of my own marketing, part of my own message has been about self value and worth and that our feminine essence helps us know our own inherent value. There is a subtle flaw here I want to transform. And that is this: I no longer want to use my feminine energy or essence as a bargaining tool for my own value as a human. I no longer want to use anything as a bargaining tool for my inherent worthiness or existence. How many actions do you take, words you speak, thoughts you think, deals and agreements you make, relationships you stay in because they are somehow a bargaining chip for your own value? NO MORE I SAY. When I really got this, I started to see everywhere that I was still attaching my value out in the world as something that could be questioned and how that was creating a vicious cycle of self imprisonment. Everything in my world was a question of my own value and that was painful and heavy. When you make your value something that’s not questionable, you can start to get down to the real deal about what’s really going on, what you really want,...
How to Harness your Feminine Presence without Intimidating Others

How to Harness your Feminine Presence without Intimidating Others

It’s almost 2015 and that means you’re thinking about your plans for the year and how you want to set the tone for it all. As you’re doing this, I want to chime in with a feminine presence tool that will help you make sure your 2015 plans are not wilted, limp, and flacid, coming from a stance that is a version of you that is so 2014, two thousand and late…. If you want your 2015 goals with soul and plans for your life and biz to start FEELING more in alignment with who you want to become, you’ve got to bring in the INNER TIGER. We want you to be soft, flowing, and surrendered, which is different than limp and apatheitc. We want the tension and the meltyness in the middle. This is wholeness: masculine AND feminine together. The title of this video is actually “How to harness your feminine presence without intimidating others” and comes from a question that was from Kendall and the survey I sent out recently. I picked this question first because I have personally struggled with this question my whole life, feeling like people are always telling me I intimidated them upon first meeting AND because many women also feel that they hold back their own beauty, power, and joy because it might be *too much* for others. I’ve been reading a book lately called “Straight Line Leadership” and one of the big concepts is on what STANCE you are taking in life and that your stance (i.e. the stance of a CEO of a company vs an employee, the stance of...

Ressurection: Unearthing a childhood dream

When I stopped thinking about my legacy and started appreciating each little moment. When I stopped thinking about what I want to be known for in my work and started asking myself how I WANT TO KNOW MYSELF When I stopped thinking I needed to be a spiritual guru, teacher, channel, business chick, cool entrepreneur… When I realized that it’s about the experience of life that I’d LOVE to have this time around. When I realized that running women’s circles and talking about the feminine isn’t the ultimate goal of my life. When I grieved and grieved the loss of something so existential from my childhood and the choices I have made, the way I’ve circled around my own joy. Avoiding it. When I stopped feeling responsible for healing the burdens of my lineage. When I started to put my time and energy into something that brings me joy. When I started to make movement my priority. Training my body a priority. Caring for my body so I can get in my 10,000 hours. When I heard the universe asking me “WHO DO YOU WANT TO BE? you get to decide. That is what this year is about for you.” Inside I hear myself screaming. I’m a dancer. I’m a fucking dancer. I choose...
What you DON’T need when you are stuck (dancing involved)

What you DON’T need when you are stuck (dancing involved)

There is an epidemic happening: It’s called Information Overload.  What I hear often from women I work with is “I feel like I have so much information, TOO much information, so much so that I don’t even know what to do with it all”. They say to me “I just feel frustrated, I can see all my patterns, what I need to change or do, but I just can’t do it, and I am stuck.” At this point, most of us (including me) get caught in a cycle of seeking outside for answers. The next book, the next teacher, the next workshop, the next thing that will help you move forward. But here’s the thing: Most often at this place in your cycle, what’s happening is not that you need more information, it’s that you are too full and havn’t digested anything. You are avoiding feeling something, avoiding your body, avoiding being present. And nothing, NOTHING, else will help you move forward until you understand how to come back home, get connected, and realize that the clarity you really want comes after you’ve returned to yourself, not after you buy that next course. This video is about how to gain your own insight by going within BEFORE you go outside to take action. Because nothing you do outside is ever gonna feel good if you don’t feel connected to yourself. It’s also a video that was created on two levels. This weekend I happened to record myself freestyle dancing in my new house and when I started to edit this particular words of wisdom, I though to myself, I...
What to do when you don’t know what to say…

What to do when you don’t know what to say…

On Monday I walked into a networking event, and a woman met my eyes and said hello, and I just started balling my eyes out. I was feeling tons of pressure and emotions.  I was having one of those “why are we here, is this what life is about, what is the point of all this” moments.   I immediately questioned myself about why the F I was even at the meeting if I was feeling so inadequate at the time. Having just moved, just finished my Feminine Presence class , not having any clear offerings at the moment and exploring working with several different groups of people (Personal Branding, Message Clarity and emotional resilience/confidence building with women, mentoring teen girls, and helping men understand how their energy can support powerful women) ,  I just didn’t feel  like I could do that damned 30 second commercial about who I am, what I do and who I help.   So when it was my turn, I stood up, put my hand on my lower belly, took a breath, turned my heart light on and just started speaking loud and clear. “The most powerful part of you is the most vulnerable…” and from there some other words came out of my mouth, I don’t remember what they were.   I had no idea what I would say, but what I did know was this: What I lacked in clarity of words, I made up for in my own trusting that whatever I said would guide me.   I’ve been jamming lately with clients about personal branding and doing work on my...
Throw Away your Feminine Archetypes….and Be Yourself.

Throw Away your Feminine Archetypes….and Be Yourself.

What would you say if I asked you to throw out all your archetypes, goddesses, and inspirational females you try to model yourself after? I started my first Art of Feminine Presence class in boulder this week and the theme of the series is DEFINE YOUR OWN FEMININE ARCHETYPE. I encouraged my ladies to throw away goddesses, inspirational leaders, and other feminine inspirations OUT THERE for the duration of our series to give themselves the space to feel and receive their own core essence. Kinda radical I suppose, but you know me. Do archetypes help us embody aspects of ourselves, yes. They can. AND they can also leave those aspects right were we found them, in the archetypes never to be integrated. Here’s my experience, not theory.  At first, the archetypes and inspirations are a muse, an inspiration. They are the INITIATION, the way shower. But when you want to bring it into YOUR BODY, YOUR VOICE,  YOUR MOVEMENT, when you’re looking to females OUT THERE for this, the best you’re gonna get is still feeling like there is something missing inside of you, because what you want is perpetually OUT THERE. Until you go within and discover the visceral , tangible, sense and feeling of your own essence, and then begin the process of bringing the inside out so you can have your own impact and presence reflected back to you, you will always feel like you don’t know your own value. This last year has been pivotal for me because I used it to digest what I had learned, and it was not always easy or painless....