Your Worth isn’t even on the Table

Your Worth isn’t even on the Table

Try this on for size. Your WORTH isn’t up for questioning. Your WORTH isn’t even on the table. It’s non negotiable. It’s not even a THING! The last month or so I’ve personally been grappling with this nasty energy of unworthiness, self doubt, and not enoughness. It’s been more present than usual, more up in the air and showing up in all of my client conversations. In fact part of my own marketing, part of my own message has been about self value and worth and that our feminine essence helps us know our own inherent value. There is a subtle flaw here I want to transform. And that is this: I no longer want to use my feminine energy or essence as a bargaining tool for my own value as a human. I no longer want to use anything as a bargaining tool for my inherent worthiness or existence. How many actions do you take, words you speak, thoughts you think, deals and agreements you make, relationships you stay in because they are somehow a bargaining chip for your own value? NO MORE I SAY. When I really got this, I started to see everywhere that I was still attaching my value out in the world as something that could be questioned and how that was creating a vicious cycle of self imprisonment. Everything in my world was a question of my own value and that was painful and heavy. When you make your value something that’s not questionable, you can start to get down to the real deal about what’s really going on, what you really want,...
The evolved man: A brief look into what he won’t do, will do, and needs from you

The evolved man: A brief look into what he won’t do, will do, and needs from you

The evolved man: A brief look into what he won’t do, will do, and needs from you What he won’t do: Coddle you Agree with everything you do and say Make it safe and secure for you Make it comfortable for you Make it easy for you Let you hide behind him… for very long Entertain the ways you try to consciously or unconsciously manipulate him Play into unconscious power struggles At some point, you realize that he is SAFE because he is real and because of all that he won’t do. What he has been known to do: Stay up all night with you helping you unravel your shame, repressed anger and guilt Encourage you to get angry at him and tell him exactly how you feel Call you on your bullshit and your stories and let you work it out on your own Give you presence and attention that is like water to your rose buds Want you to blossom and succeed more than he wants that for himself Provide you with a wide open space of freedom to roam the world in ( which if you don’t want to be free inside somewhere is really hard to receive) Commit himself to helping you grow into your full potential Help you go very deep into your core wounds so that you can clear them out Keep sex very sacred and whole with you Be Generally more private and contained with his sexuality and choice of sexual partners (I said private not prude) At some point, you realize that he is much more than you ever gave him...
Supporting a Culture of Evolving Men: The Emerging Feminine Responsibility

Supporting a Culture of Evolving Men: The Emerging Feminine Responsibility

We want to support a culture of evolving men who don’t only see problems and try to fix them. We want to support a culture of evolving men who can see what IS right now, see the perfection in all the working parts good and “bad”, not throw a tantrum about it, and see their way through the issues of the world to the other side, to the solution, to the solution for the greater good of humanity. We support men who are on purpose and who will stay on purpose, prioritize their purpose even over our own agendas, and willingly give their gifts to the world. We take care in the men around us and use our intuition and gifts to help them become the best versions of themselves. We give what we can to help them grow and learn to be better stewards of our families, communities, and the planet. We face the wounds we have with our fathers and understand how we have emasculated ourselves as well as the men around us. We face our anger and rage and we learn to move into conflict and tension with courage, so that we may come out in forgiveness and be transformed. We have to get to a place where we can be responsible for our choices and our emotions so that we can stop presenting men with the problems of our own doing, asking them to hold space for us where we are unwilling to hold space for them, and asking them to stay small so that we can feel safe and powerful. We can and will...
What Happens When a Man Shows you Where He Stands

What Happens When a Man Shows you Where He Stands

I’ll never forget the feeling, sitting next to him on the sidewalk, feeling his presence. He wasn’t smiling. He wasn’t happy. He wasn’t warm. Yet he wasn’t closed to me either. He was clear. He was standing his ground. He was driving his stake further into the earth. My body was reeling. All kinds of knots inside me were becoming present. Not the knots of danger or warning, but the knots of old held onto emotions, things to be let go of. The sort of knots that were putting me face to face with my self, with what I needed to look at and be responsible for. The places I had been placing blame I felt myself wanting to grab his attention, fix myself, fix him, do something to make the uncomfortable feeling in my body go away. I felt like I had disappointed him and myself. For a woman, there is a distinct flavor of feeling when a man that we love feels disappointed in us. It’s not the most fun feeling. It brings up all our deepest fears and emotions about abandonment and feeling unworthy. But what happened as I just sat, staying fiercly with myself and my own internal emotions instead of running from them, was quite amazing. I looked over at him and I felt so pulled in, I felt a polarity I hadn’t felt in a while. It was so strong. His face became even more attractive, his walk was more potent, he became that much more fuck-able. His center of gravity got deeper. This was the presence of a man who wasn’t willing...
He’s not coming to save you, he’s coming to SEE you

He’s not coming to save you, he’s coming to SEE you

When you can show up in a woman’s world in a way where your beingness says to her “I see you and I see your whole world. You’re whole reality”. You step into her world seeing ALL of her, even what she is unwilling to see in herself. And yo…u say with your presence I see all of this and all that you are and are creating and I love it all and I’m not afraid to show you where and what you’re running from.and it’s not with any sort of agenda that you need to show her any of this. It’s simply how you be, it’s a message to her subconscious. You are inviting her to step into the highest version of her because you can see it and you know how to be and speak past the unconscious parts of her, the programs. You can hear past her words and hear what she is actually saying or wanting. This is my new definition of HOTTNESS in a man. A presence like that. One that simultaneously turns me on, brings me back to wholeness, and kinda scares the crap out of me all at once. Like the loving and terrifying nature of god. The thing I’m learning is that I’m not as scared as I once was to see what I’m not seeing. It’s relieving for me when someone can show me without agenda. It’s nourishing. I’m not relying on a man to do it, or anyone to do it. but we are inter-personal beings. We can’t see ourselves without a mirror for a reason. it takes a...
When suddenly you realize that you’ve located all your power inside a man…

When suddenly you realize that you’ve located all your power inside a man…

I realized that I’ve located all of my power inside of you, I said to him. With a smile, he said with his hand cupped open as though he was just holding my power in his hands, Yup. It’s all here. The thing is, I don’t want it. I just stared at him with amazement. Giving me your power sucks because I won’t do anything with it. Some people will use the power you give them to help you or manipulate you. I’ll just stare at it… look at it, it’s so cute. He was right, I felt like I was suffocating. In fact for a whole week my whole body was so congested I had mucus coming out of my mouth and nose. It felt like my heart was collapsing. From this point I can either abandon you or terrorize you… and I don’t really want to do either, He said to me. I don’t want that either. And on my end I recognize that I could either say fuck this it’s not working and I’m not happy or I could stay and actually see what it feels like to be in relationship with a man when I dont’ give away all of my power. You see, I came to a very hard truth and realization: that I actually have no idea how to be in my power and be in relationship with anyone. In EVERY relationship I’ve had. All of them, with men or women, I have been in either of these three scenarios:  1) They pedestal me and I get to keep all my power (...